Lived Experience Forum

[NatureLover]

Take care, @Former-Member  

[Jynx]

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For those of us who do not identify as LGBTQIA+, what are some ways we can support this community as allies? If you do identify as LGBTQIA+, what are some things that would be helpful for you to see/hear from your allies?

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• Don’t assume someone’s sexual or gender identity.
• Practice using they/them pronouns and providing your own pronouns (even if you’re cisgender) when meeting people.
• Be aware that there is more than one way to be in relationship with others, and that not everyone is searching for romantic/sexual relationships
• Don’t be afraid to speak up – if you know someone’s behaviour is homophobic/transphobic (and can safely do so), educate them.

[Former-Member]

@Adge I do hope for a world where you can do this whenever/wherever regardless of gender Thank you for sharing this, we are right beside you.

@Former-Member Sounds like a very unprofessional practitioner. Of course, there are great counsellors in the world. Our wonderful @Jynx is evidence of that 🙂 But for those who have experienced unethical practitioners please know you can submit a complaint via Ahpra within Australia.

[eth]

Hey @Adge   I've met a couple of men who love wearing skirts - it's much more comfortable for a start if you have those parts!!  (just sayin'!)  Did you know David Bowie designed men's dresses in his hey day?

There are many countries in the world where men don't wear trousers actually.  

Sorry, now I'm off on a tangent!!

[Jynx]

Take care @Former-Member, I hope you can get some rest and that tomorrow is better for you. Thanks for coming and sharing with us tonight 

[Former-Member]

@Jynx 

That's interesting!

Yeah I'm not diagnosed as being on the spectrum but the qualities that make people point it out seems to be gender-related maybe??

I don't think women are better huggers than anyone else for example but I categorically don't hug - I just don't really see the point or enjoy it - and that can be seen as a bit cold ("womanly quality" being defined as warm, I guess?)

[Former-Member]

Goodnight @Former-Member sleep well and be gentle

@eth Wow that's an amazing dress!

@Jynx Love all of these wonderful points. Most of my friends are heterosexual cis individuals in fact I have very few friends within the community. My friends are super self-aware and not defensive, so when something comes up that was a sore point, we simply flesh it out together and have some gentle education with each other. It makes me a wee bit sad this is not the case for everyone. One simple one for me is, people still to this day apply hetero normatives to my relationship. Asking which of us is the man between me and my partner, I now simply respond with "neither because we are both women." Simple haha.

[outlander]

hi everyone
im soooo late! i didnt get the tag and kinda forgot what day it was 🤦‍♀️ just reading through now but its sounds like theres been lots of convo happening which is great to see

[eth]

@Jynx   I think one of the main things we can do as allies is simply accept and use whatever language works for the person we are communicating with.  And if we get it wrong while we're learning, simply apologise and move on.  Listening is really important.  There are also many ways to advocate e.g. with legal changes and awareness raising campaigns that we come across e.g. on fb.  As with any person who identifies in any marginalised group, it's about listening and consulting with them about anything that concerns them.  As they say in an alliance I'm part of 'nothing about us without us'.

[Jynx]

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@Former-Member wrote:

@Jynx 

That's interesting!

Yeah I'm not diagnosed as being on the spectrum but the qualities that make people point it out seems to be gender-related maybe??

I don't think women are better huggers than anyone else for example but I categorically don't hug - I just don't really see the point or enjoy it - and that can be seen as a bit cold ("womanly quality" being defined as warm, I guess?)

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Yeah wow, just more ways that sexism comes out - defining that women should be more ANYTHING. And of course sexism and transphobia are pretty closely intertwined, because both emerge from the toxicity of the gender binary and the expectations put upon people to act according to this social construct.